Fear

I try to deny myself the fact that things scare me. I guess I like to think I'm stronger than I am. I normally don't like to catalog my fears but I am reminded of them periodically. If I were to list them the list would change every day, hopefully these will fade and be replaced or deleted tomorrow. Here's what bothers me right now: -Fear of phone calls and door bells, especially late at night; it usually means bad news. -Fear of my son being hurt, being a parent really does change you. -Fear of germs, I wash my hands probably twenty times a day. It just feels good to be clean. On a brighter note, the TV is on in the background, it is utterly fucking ridiculous how bad television is. The level of schadenfreude is astounding. How vapid the American public is, channel surfing is a nightmare, I'll be thrilled when I can go to four channels; Simpsons/Seinfeld channel, Comedy Central, English Premier League Channel and Discovery Channel. I could go with that little variety, but if you think about it that's a pretty good smattering of the worthwhile offerings.